A New Direction

In the course of several telephone calls between Deana and I today, we began discussing the crap hands life has dealt both of us lately (and by lately, I might personally mean too effing long...but hey, that's just me). Naturally, we hashed over and shared all the ways we have coped with said stress. And frankly, I'm super impressed with our abilities and kind of astounded by the similarity of our philosophies as we actually have very different temperaments. Our combined experiences have left us with a unique perspective on this journey we call life, as well as a few tried-and-true strategies to find and create joy in one's life rather than just survive each day. And that's when it hit us: We should become life coaches. Now, obviously it takes time, persistence, marketing and word of mouth to become successful in this business...and, of course, your coaching needs to produce results. To kick start our new roles, we'd like to offer four proven strategies for dealing with adversity and improving the joy in your life.

• Be open to change in your life, including new ideas, things and people.Sometimes we get too caught up in our own comfort zone. We become entrenched in outdated habits, suspicious of new people, judgmental of foreign concepts and ideas and closed off to change. Now I am the first to admit that I do not like change per se, but some of the best moments in my life and some of my closest friends came by taking a chance and embracing change. The photo above is an example of a new friend I met one night when the girls were out on a 'Bad Mommies' night. By moving outside my immediate circle of friends to include someone new, I (and by extension the other gals) got the opportunity to get to know a really great guy...for that night anyway. This particular encounter did not develop into a friendship. But I was open to change and took the plunge into the unknown. I feel that I am a better person for this and I think you can see that he was just as glad to have met me.

• Acknowledge the beauty in yourself, develop your talents and seek out creativity every day.
  

You may not be aware of this, but Deana has a very strong background in 'The Theater', including a BFA in Acting as culmination of her undergraduate years at UNL. At one point in time, Deana intended a career as an actress. However, life (and the need for reliable employment, a steady paycheck and the ability to eat at regular intervals) has moved her from that career in the arts to one in law (while you can make the argument that there is an awful lot of acting that goes on in the legal profession, I work in medicine and throw no stones). And it turned out that Deana absolutely loves her work. But she has not abandoned creativity and expression in her life. We have regular scary-oke, I mean karaoke nights which are so much fun and very therapeutic. Never forget the healing power of song...or dance, or crafting, or art. Whatever your passion, make sure to include it in your everyday life. Celebrate the majesty of who you are and the power inside of you.

• Recapture the adventurous spirit of childhood, the freedom to completely let go and enjoy the moment.
  

I cannot stress the importance of "letting it all go" enough. Each of us has a job, a family, a home and financial obligations that demand the majority of our time and attention. This is good and as it should be for the most part. But as with everything in life, balance is the key. Too many people become so focused on the "grown-up responsibilities" that they forget life is supposed to be fun. Savoring each opportunity to surround ourselves with positivity, to choose joy and to purposely seek out fun & relaxation leads to improved mental health...not to mention an undeniable attractiveness. Just check out my good friend Kozy. He has adopted this particular strategy as personal mantra of sorts and it has proven extremely successful.

• Always remember to be the best friend you can be to those that you love and they will return your love and kindness in abundance.
  

I was lucky enough to have met Deana when I was 18 years old at the start of my freshman year at UNL. I feel even luckier that our friendship has not just lasted but also prospered over the intervening years (though I will not say just how many years that has been - a lady never reveals her age). We have also been lucky enough to have introduced each other to many other friends, most very, very nice people but a couple real douchebags (c'mon, you know I mean your law-school buddy Johanna...and don't forget my asshat ex). Yet, many of these people have become very close to both of us, forming a circle of love and trust that surrounds us daily.

We hope that you have enjoyed this installment in our never ending quest for self-improvement. We are planning on making this a recurring theme, perhaps Life Coaching Saturdays. I don't know that we'll make it every Saturday- to be honest it depends on our social calendars. But since our dance cards have been shockingly EMPTY of late I'd say the odds are good for another life lesson next weekend. Pass the word about our services. Maybe someday we could even get paid for bestowing these tidbits of our accumulated wisdom...it could happen. Money would be great but we would settle for a couple of whistles. Really.